The
Life Of The Children
Forty-two
days after birth, when the child is blessed by the
priest, be is given anklets and bracelets of brass and
silver in place of the black strings that he wore tied
around his wrists since he was seven days old. His ears
are pierced, and a thread is passed through each hole
so that three months later he can wear little flower-shaped
car-rings of gold. Around his neck is tied a necklace
composed of various amulets that will protect him and
influence his growth: a silver tube containing a dried
piece of the child's own umbilical cord, some coloured
glass beads, a piece of black coral (akar bahar) , an
ancient coin, and a tiger's tooth or a piece of tiger
bone. This is all the child wears until he is about
seven years old, but little girls are given a skirt
and a sash three or four years before. The repugnance
of the Balinese for actions characteristic of animals
causes them not to permit children to crawl on all fours,
and before the child is three months old he may not
even touch the earth and is carried everywhere.
Offerings
are made when the child is three months old (nelu bulanin)
and again at his first anniversary (otonan) when the
child is 2 1 o days old, one Balinese year. Then he
is dressed in rich brocades and is 'given gold bracelets,
anklets, a necklace set with rubies and sapphires, and
agold disk with a, ruby in it, which is pasted on the
child's forehead. His hair is then cut (ngutangin bok)
, and his head is shaved clean except for a lock or
hair on the forehead that is never cut; otherwise he
would become ill. On this date the priest blesses the
child again, while offerings are made to the family
shrine, to the sun, and to the evil spirits.
The
well-to-do make a big occasion of the first birthday
and give a banquet with theatrical performances, but
it is a rule for all to give a shadow-play as a part
of the ceremonies. After the first anniversary less
attention is paid to birthdays; the third year has a
special significance and perhaps the mother will make
some offerings in subsequent years, but grown people
forget about them and soon lose track of their ages.
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On
his first birthday the child receives his magic name
from the priest, who writes various propitious names,
obtained through a divination, on pieces of palm-leaf
which be burns. The name given to the child is that
which can be made out most clearly from the charred
remains, or the one that takes the longest time to burn.
This is a secret name that no one ever hears and soon
even the father forgets it. A baby is simply called
" the child, of so and-so," but eventually
he is given a personal name by his parents. Even this
name has an influence over his life and should he become
sick often, the name is. to blame and a more appropriate
one is chosen by the priest or the witch-doctor.. Boys
and girls are called by their names, but it would be
poor i manners to do so after the child has grown up.
A personal name is private property and it is always
patronizing to call a person by his name. High-caste
people keep their names secret and go trough life called
only by their caste titles.
Most
commonly used are the words that refer to tb,.e order
of a person 11 s birth: the first child of Sudras is
called Wayan; Putu or Gede for high castes; the second
child is Made or Nengah; the third is Nyoman; and the
fourth is Ketut. The order is repeated for subsequent
children. Satrias add the word Nguirah to their other
titles to indicate the purity of their descent , (for
example, Anak Agung Ngurah Gede). The words for father
(bapa) and mother (meme) have a very elastic application;
every uncle and aunt is called bapa and meme, and every
cousin is a brother or sister, but well-bred young man
calls his: father guru (" teacher ") . Elderly
people are called grandfather (pekak) or grandmother
(dadong) as a sign of respect in the same way that a
young man calls his older friends " elder brother
" (bli) , while a girl is called " sister
" (embok) . After a sudra couple have children
their name changes to " Father or Mother of so-and-so."
Our servant Dog, the father of little Muluk was called
Pan muluk and his wife was known as Men muluk. Gusti.'s
wife, a woman of high caste, was called gusti Rake,
but after she became the mother of gusti gede she became
known as gusti Biang Rake, biang being a polite term
for " mother."
From
the time the child can walk, lie is left to himself
and falls in the care of other children. Small girls
know how to take care of babies with the same proficiency
as their mothers and it is common to see babies carried
on hips of girls only slightly older. The child learns
early to be self-sufficient and is free to wander all
over the village and to do as he pleases. A child is
often called I dewa, " a god "; he is not
considered responsible for his actions, because, as
they say, " his mind is still undeveloped "
and it is the god within him that acts through his body.
At home there is no regular discipline and no pampering;
the parents do not intimidate their child, but rather
wax him into obedience as an equal. And he is never
beaten; if a mother loses patience and strikes her child,
lie would, in all probability, strike back and she would
be mortified and would grieve over her rash impulse.
The sensible Balinese saN, that if a child is beaten
his tender soul will be seriously damaged.
Frequently the father is inclined to be more demonstrative
than the mother, and it is common to see a man with
his child in his arms, taking him everywhere and talking
to him as if he were a grown-up. It is extremely rare
to hear a child cry. Thus the child grows among other
children 4s a member of a children's republic, with
an independent life of its own. Often groups of children
go out on expeditions, remaining away from home all
day. When they get hungry they cab buy food from a public
stand with the pennies that are given to them every
day. Only by the independence and lack of pampering
can one explain the well-mannered seriousness and the
self-sufficiency of Balinese children. With no special
behaviour set for children apart from that of grown-ups,
the mentality of a Balinese child develops quickly.
Nothing is bidden from him; he listens to all conversations
of grown people and observes the acts of animals, so
his sexual education begins as soon as he is able to
talk. A child in Bali knows facts about which an adolescent
in the West is totally ignorant, and we knew children
under five who could make erotic jokes. Their sense
of responsibility became patent to me when I became
the guest of a small boy in whose house I had spent
the night. The next morning he took me hr a walk to
see his village, showed me the temples, and introduced
me to the local prince then we went to the market to
see the good-looking girls of the village and he told
me the story of the love affairs of each, while he bought
fried peanuts, from his favourite vendor to treat me.
He even offered me some of his own cigarettes; it is
normal for little boys and girls to smoke and they show
preference for a cer. tain brand of tobacco perfumed
with cinnamon and cloves in little cigarettes wrapped
in corn husk that sell six for a penny.
A
boy assists his father in the Work at home and in the
fields, and cares for the cattle, driving the cows and
buffaloes and bathing them at sunset. He learns his
father's trade, and by the time he is about eight or
ten he has a good knowledge of practical matters. Besides
the hybrid education that the Balinese now receive in
the Dutch schools, a boy learns to read and write in
Balinese characters from his father or his guru";
mythology, ethics, and history he learns from watching
plays and puppet shows, where he can pick up literary
terms and become a scholar. Little girls learn from
their mothers to cook, weave, thresh rice, and make
offerings. Although the higher education is rather the
attribute of men, women are not barred from acquiring
knowledge, and even peasant women show high spirits
and a keen mentality.
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